I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
