umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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