you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize