Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Randomize
