You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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