i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Randomize
