he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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