My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
