i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
