There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Watching her eat just hurts me
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
