we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
