I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
