just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
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Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
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Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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