No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
