then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
