Is it normal to miss your booty call?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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