if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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