Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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