Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ujelly hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression

Fav 5 836 4130
share tweet
(281): View more from Texas

Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.

Fav 137 7391 5951
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has

Fav 14 3849 1066
share tweet
(910): View more from North Carolina

I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test

Fav 4 2232 833
share tweet
(810): View more from Michigan

He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.

Fav 24 3457 1013
share tweet
(724): View more from Pennsylvania

That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.

Fav 6 669 1162
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(951): View more from California

Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.

Fav 4 1461 751
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(816): View more from Missouri

Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!

Fav 1 669 340
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(479): View more from Arkansas

Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.

Fav 1 246 319
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT