Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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