She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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