She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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