she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize