I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
