He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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