Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
