Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
