Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize