I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
