bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize