D3 body, D1 cock
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Someone signed my nipple.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
