if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
