Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
