He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize