I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
