i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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