Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
