Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
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