Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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