Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
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