bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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