I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
It's shark week go big or go home
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize
