Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Boobs speak an international language.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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