false alarm. still invincible.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize