Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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