dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
