I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize