ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize