I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Drunk is not a location!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
