Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Shame - the story of my life.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
