erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he puts the penis in happiness.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
